Carly Fiorina Rises From the Crypt of Failed Candidacies

—April 30, 2016

“She’s ba-a-a-a-ck!”

Yes, folks, former presidential candidate, first woman to lead a Fortune top-20 company, and first woman ranked by several entities as the worst American CEO of all time, has risen from the crypt of failed candidacies to be tapped as a running mate for Republican contender Ted Cruz.

Carly “just-look-at-that-face” Fiorina essentially represents a long-shot Hail Mary pass by Cruz, and she will undoubtedly soon return to the crypt of failed candidacies. However, her very presence as VP candidate, not to mention her earlier bid for the presidency, is yet another indication of how absurd American politics has become.

When you look up the word “hubris” in the dictionary, Carly’s face should serve as the image.

The woman has never held political office and yet thinks she has the chops to successfully govern the entire country. This based upon her self-proclaimed success as the first female CEO of a Fortune 20 company—a five-year stint at Hewlett-Packard that resulted in a 50 percent drop in the company’s value, loss of 30,000 jobs and coerced pay cuts to remaining employees.

While promoting the necessity of the layoffs and pay cuts she authorized the purchase of a $30 million Gulfstream IV corporate jet for her personal use. Seems that Carly followed the dictates of the Marie Antoinette school of “Let Them Eat Cake.”

But I suppose her short tenure at HP was successful…for herself, given that her salary tripled while in power, and that she secured a $21 million severance package upon her firing.

Carly’s limited political experience includes a failed 2010 bid for a California U.S. Senate seat, and work as point person on economics and business for Sen. John McCain’s failed 2008 presidential campaign.

She managed to win the Republican primary for the Senate seat, but incumbent Sen. Barbara Boxer handily beat her in the general election. Pundits believe that the 30,000 job losses during her tenure at HP were a key factor in her defeat. During the campaign the Los Angeles Times also determined that Carly had failed to vote in most elections throughout her life. Carly’s response was that “people die for the right to vote…so, shame on me.”

As for her work on the McCain campaign, her prominent role came to an abrupt end after she publicly stated that neither John McCain nor his running mate Sarah Palin had the experience needed to run a major company like HP.

But Carly would have us believe that she obviously has the experience needed to run a major country like the USA.

While announcing the pick of Carly as his running mate, Cruz said his number one priority for America is bringing jobs back to America.” If that is his number one priority then why in the hell did he tap a woman famous for destroying 30,000-plus jobs for his second in command?

Absurd, or what?

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